There are fewer diverse areas for labels than when you apply them to people as a way to describe their sexuality, identity, or interests, for example. Consider the words Crossdressing or crossdresser, these “labels” can sound sterile, one-dimensional, bland, and even boring. While, on the other hand, they can encourage visions of strange, abnormal behavior and indicators of unacceptable or immoral behavior. Whatever one’s initial reaction to the “label,” the fact that one has an impression or opinion means that we have a basis or experience on which to draw the conclusions we do draw. The depth and breadth of that experience shape the credibility of our choices and thus their value both to oneself and to others. Being a lifelong crossdresser and running a well established and respected Costume Service has allowed me to question my own motives and emotions and hear the views of others on crossdressing.
So for someone who has some interest but little or no knowledge in this area, here are some ideas to dispel some assumptions and hopefully encourage you to dig deeper.
Just because someone is presenting as a woman doesn’t mean they want to attract a man’s attention. In other words, don’t assume they’re gay. The vast majority of crossdressers are straight, some are, but does sexuality matter when you meet someone for the first time?
What’s interesting is the side questions that come up once people realize you’re not gay. There’s the “then why do you do it then?” Obvious but boring question, a bit like the statement “do you come here often?” No imagination, but you know it’s coming. The following statements may give insight from quite a different perspective:
Because I can! – OK, that’s someone who is generally comfortable with himself. Recognize that they themselves may not fully understand why, and therefore, if they don’t, how can they explain it to you? This may indicate how complex the problem really is.
It is an expression of my personality that my masculine persona does not allow me to portray: a 5′ 5″ guy in his masculine gray world goes unnoticed, while a 6′ 1″ glamorous lady is complimented, noticed, recognized and even appreciated. A boost to self-esteem or self-esteem.
When I get dressed I feel more relaxed – We all live in the pressure cooker of life. The act of transferring to a feminine persona and relinquishing responsibility, even temporarily, for one’s masculine role can be very therapeutic and relieve tension and stress.
Three simple statements that can provide information and food for thought.