One of the most common questions I get from parents on the subject of child safety centers on how to choose the right martial arts or self-defense program for your child. Sometimes it’s even presented as a direct request about who you would recommend in the area where they live.
Unfortunately, I don’t maintain a list of preferred schools across the country that focus on real-world self-defense for kids. There are a handful of schools around the world that I am personally affiliated with, but the job of keeping track of what everyone is doing and then setting up a referral system (from people I would actually send MY own children to!) it would be too daunting at this point.
However, there are some very important key points that I would like to offer that all parents should consider when looking for classes for a young child, boy or girl.
5 Key Points to Finding the Perfect Child Safety and Self Defense Program for Your Child
1) Be clear on what you want. ask yourself, “What exactly are you looking for?” Are you looking for “Susie” to get a black belt and win some trophies, or are you looking for her to learn real-world self-defense tactics that she can (and this is important) use against a bigger kid or adult attacker on the streets? today – not in 16th century Japan, China or Korea?
Believe me. The answer to this question will be critically important, because it will determine the answers to, or even the need for, any other questions or considerations that follow it.
Because? Because we must be very clear about the results we want BEFORE we begin the journey of finding the answers. This is as true of martial arts and self-defense as it is of the career we choose, the person we marry, or any other momentous decision. And, if the child safety decision regarding your son or daughter is not considered vitally important…
… I do not know what it is!
With that being said, you should understand that my focus is on self defense in the real world, No sporty karate or the latest craze in “parent-please-cute-child” activities. This is true whether we are talking about martial arts in general, the Japanese martial art of Ninjutsu and how it relates to child safety, or self defense and street fighting. So if you’re still reading, I’m going to assume you’re looking for a good, solid self-defense and child safety program for your child.
So…
2) Look for value, not price. That being said, we all understand that having a cardiologist, a specialist, treat us for a heart problem is going to cost more than having our GP do it, right? We know it and we accept it because we want a specialist, not a general practitioner. And we know we’re not paying for diagnosis and treatment, right? We are paying for the extra years of training this person went through…
…to be able to make that diagnosis and save our lives!
The same is true in the world of martial arts and self defense training. You can find anyone with a black belt and trained in any XYZ martial art to teach your child to do any kick, punch, or martial arts move of her particular style. It may not be as easy for you to find someone who has the real practical knowledge and street experience to back up those lessons.
The issue of price is for you, and only for you. Is it true that you can find schools and instructors that teach good stuff for less, and commercial schools that teach “feel good” karate for a ton of money? Of course, goal…
When it comes to your child’s self-defense, don’t skimp here. Even if money is tight, most parents can easily save an extra $20/month (PER child) just by using the McDonald’s money they spend and applying it toward class tuition, not to mention the extra gas, fees and associated costs. with Johnny participating in all those extra activities That won’t save your life if you need it! But more on this later.
3) Look for professionals. It’s one thing to have real-world experience, and quite another to not act like a bully in a classroom full of kids. Your child, any student, needs a teacher who is focused on student progress and skill development, No in his own ego gratification.
I know that your son is learning to defend himself, but that should never be done at the expense of his own safety. Be sure to arrange to watch a class or two, and not just the beginners. Take note of how instructors and upperclassmen relate to and treat each other, both on and off the mat.
4) Don’t put this off. It can be hard to do the legwork, reviewing a bunch of schools or instructors, but… remember this. You are not buying a sofa or a car.
You are buying self defense lessons for his child. You are buying him the gifts of future safety, happiness, security, and the ability to protect others of his choosing.
What I mean is… if this is important to you… really important – if your child is important – then don’t look at your calendar trying to figure out when it will fit into your busy schedule.
I hear and see this all the time.
“Good,” the father says, “I just don’t know how we’re going to fit this between his two teams in soccer, swimming, Scouting, and underwater basket weaving classes.”
Well, the last one I made up. But you get the idea.
If you wait until you have time, you are also silently hoping that what you fear MAY happen, IT WILL NOT happen. In essence, she is playing with the safety of her son.
So, dont wait
And finally…
5) Don’t let your child dictate whether or not he will learn to protect himself. Remember, our children know little to nothing about the world. They don’t know what dangers are out there. They hardly know about bullies at school and how far these people are willing to go to get what they want.
I talk about this and 9 other mistakes that parents make every day in my book titled, “10 really stupid mistakes…” I know that as parents we never want our kids to get mad at us or make them do something they don’t want to do. And yet we do it all the time.
We make them clean up, eat well, flush the toilet, learn good manners, brush their teeth and even go to school for twelve long years… Whether they want to or not.
Because?
Not because “they” want to or like it. Because we know it’s good for them and it will make them grow to be positive, powerful and productive people in the world.
We didn’t give them the option to get those shots as babies. So why would we give them the choice to learn or not to be able to prevent a thief, rapist or stalker from harming them?
You know what… I don’t know either.