If we didn’t have to bother with apostrophes, typing would be a lot easier, some would say. For me, it would take all the pleasure out of writing because I personally love the challenge of using apostrophes to make sense of what I’m trying to convey to the reader.
I was surprised to receive an email the other day from a mother whose daughter’s English homework had been incorrectly ‘corrected’ by her school teacher. The mother wrote to me to confirm that what her daughter had written was, in fact, correct. The daughter had written “the dog gave the ball to her owner”, but the teacher corrected it to “the dog gave the ball to her owner”. What the teacher’s sentence says is: “the dog gave its owner the ball”, which is clearly nonsense. The only time you should insert an apostrophe in the word “your” is when it is short for “is” or “has.” Frankly, I was horrified that an English teacher would have made such a mistake. The daughter’s version, “the dog gave the ball to its owner” is correct because the word “his” (without an apostrophe) is the equivalent of “he, she, our, my, you, his” – “his” is the version that means belonging to, or associated with, a thing or person/animal of indeterminate gender.
Anyone, even an English teacher, could be forgiven for making a one-time mistake, but apparently this wasn’t the only correction he made. The daughter had also written, “buy your cucumbers and lettuce here,” which the teacher had corrected to “buy your cucumbers and lettuce here.” The teacher had inserted apostrophes in what are simple plural nouns, ie “cucumbers and lettuce”, which the daughter had spelled correctly. Plurals must not have apostrophes. Inserting an apostrophe into words like “tomatoes, potatoes, cucumbers, and lettuce” is known, albeit perhaps disrespectfully, as the greengrocer’s apostrophe. I suspect we’ve all seen “tomatoes and potatoes” outside a greengrocer’s shop.
It is true that there is an exception to this rule, which is when you write, for example, “Be careful with the p’s and the q’s”. If you were to write, “Watch your ps and qs,” you wouldn’t need to insert apostrophes; they are only needed in the old version to clarify the meaning because without them it would read, “Watch your ps and qs”, which would be confusing to the reader.
I must say that when I read this mother’s email, it made me fear for our children’s education, but fortunately there are those who are willing to question the so-called experts.
For much more help on the rules of apostrophes and how to use apostrophes correctly, click here – Apostrophes.